Thecompanioncoaching — A coaching practice | thecompanioncoaching.com
Burnout rarely arrives as a collapse; it arrives as shorter sleep, a shorter temper and a rising burden score, and each of those has a measurable threshold.
Start with sleep, the most common complaint caregivers report. The average caregiver gets 5.5 hours of unbroken sleep on 4-5 nights a week. If your own figure has sat at or below that for a month, treat it as a fact about the arrangement, not as a personal weakness.
Then score the strain. The Zarit Burden Interview is the standard instrument: 0-21 means little or no burden, 22-46 means moderate to severe. A score in the 22-46 band is the point at which the load should be redistributed or respite added — not the point at which to try harder.
Watch mood without flinching. An estimated 40-70% of family caregivers meet the clinical threshold for at least one symptom of depression. Persistent low mood, loss of interest in everything outside caregiving, or dread before ordinary tasks are reasons to speak to a GP, in the same way a fever would be.
On narrow screens, swipe or scroll the plate sideways.
Check the body. About 1 in 6 caregivers who support someone manually without lifting equipment report a back injury. Unintended weight change in either direction is another flag worth raising with a doctor, because it usually tracks skipped meals or stress eating rather than a deliberate choice.
Check the money. The financial markers are quieter: cutting paid hours, turning down work, or absorbing care costs without telling anyone. These do not appear on a burden questionnaire, but they decide how long the arrangement can last.
The action thresholds: past 20 hours of weekly care, respite of 3-5 days a month is commonly recommended; a Zarit score of 22 or more means the split of tasks has to change. Bring both figures to the family meeting — they convert 'I'm struggling' into numbers siblings can act on.
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